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The MINI Pullman (posted April 1st!)

From MINIUSA PR:

MINI, already known for cornering as if it were on rails, will now offer a special edition that will actually corner on rails. In light of the growing problem of gridlock and rush hour traffic, this special model is adapted to ride on all domestic gauge rail lines throughout North America.

In conjunction with the North American railway system, an exclusive right-of-way has been authorized for the specially equipped MINI to commute via rail during peak hours in major urban centers. This access, once only limited to railway utility trucks is now available to MINI owners who order the special model.

The MINI Pullman can access the railway at any major crossing gate provided care is taken not to enter into the opposing direction of prevailing rail traffic. A new feature in the onboard computer allows the MINI ‘motorman’ or woman to access individual rail line schedules to plan their travels while on the rails.

The MINI Pullman comes fitted with a special wheel package that easily locks onto standard gauge rail thus allowing MINIs to corner on the roads and the rails with equal aplomb. An upgraded dual air-horn warning system comes standard on the model to alert inattentive pedestrians and vehicles as the MINI Pullman enters into crossing gate areas.

To compliment this new model, MINI has created a line of apparel. Items from overalls to hats are available in a fetching grey ticking-stripe pattern. Accessories for the vehicle include a brass roof-mounted bell and a special auxiliary engine exhaust stack that mounts on the bonnet. For four additional passengers, a specially adapted hitch system allows for the MINI Pullman owner to add the accessory Commuter Caboose.

“Access to the national system of underground subway rail is under consideration, once the logistics of accessing the track through individual subway stations can be solved” said national railway spokesperson Lou Komodeff, “We look forward to sharing the rails with MINI as long as they are ‘going our way.”

MINI spokesperson, Hugh Moore said, “MINI has mastered the art of cornering on the roads. Now we can claim that MINIs do literally corner on rails.” MINI has scheduled the first prototype testing on public railways to commence today, April 1st, 2005 :)

Written By: MF Staff
Prestige MINI

19 Comments

Siddhartha Apr 1st, 2005 Link

Good one! Happy April to you, too!

Bob Apr 1st, 2005 Link

Hey Gabe,

Thanks for posting the story on the new pullman. I just called my MA and placed the order. If all goes well the pullman will be here August 1. The pullman is coming equipped with the german armrest as a standard feature.

Bob

Schwarz Dietmar Apr 1st, 2005 Link

I like those April 1st stories. They’re very refreshing.

michael Boice Apr 1st, 2005 Link

Who’s funnier than you! Very creative you are!

Milwaukee Liar Apr 1st, 2005 Link

You had me fooled for a minute. Very funny. Ha, Ha, Ha!

Milwaukee Liar Apr 1st, 2005 Link

You had me fooled for a minute. Very funny. Ha, Ha, Ha!

MCH Apr 1st, 2005 Link

This option does not seem safe. The average individual will be unable to safely determine if the tracks are clear. I think that more research is needed prior to releasing this option. I would estimate that it will take at least a year to safely implement the idea. Perhaps a release date of 4/1/06 or 4/1/07.

Gabe Apr 1st, 2005 Link

I can’t take credit for this one.

Sean Bancroft Apr 1st, 2005 Link

This post is at least humorous. The other is just sick. Sick I tell you.

RB Apr 1st, 2005 Link

NOT GOING TO GET ME ON THIS ONE.

But where do I sign up?

Adam Emanoff Apr 1st, 2005 Link

Sweet - where are the pics?

Casey Apr 1st, 2005 Link

Too bad the interior photos were not also posted on April 1st. I wish those were only an april fools joke :)

David Apr 1st, 2005 Link

Can this new equipment be retrofitted to my 04 MMCS?;-)

db Apr 1st, 2005 Link

so my question is, who is going to be first to market with the cow catcher attachment? Any chance MINI-Fin might pick up on this? :D

Josh Wardell Apr 1st, 2005 Link

Will 19% rail pulleys be available?

modboi Apr 1st, 2005 Link

Did any of you read the April 1st posting on MINI2 about the workers strike at the Oxford plant because the MINI/BMW execs felt that tea does not reflect well on brand image; therefore, tea was banned from the plant? British and Tea… What a riot… ;)

Gabe Apr 1st, 2005 Link

happy April 1st everyone!!!!

Gromit Apr 11th, 2005 Link

Well you did catch a rather large fish, check
http://www.autointell-news.com/News-2005/April-2005/Apr-2005-1/Apr-06-05-p6.htm

Gabe Apr 11th, 2005 Link

Wow.

RIDEMAKERZ

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Performance Accessories:
R56 JCW Suspension (Track)
R56 JCW Suspension (Street)
R53 Craven Speed Short Shifter
R53 M7 Understrut System
Kumho Ecsta SPT Tires
R53 M7 Strut Tower Plates
R53 JCW Alcantara Wheel
R53 JCW Brake Kit
R53 Webb 15% Pulley
R53 Helix MCSa 15% Pulley
R53 H-Sport 19mm Sway Bar
R53 MCS Supersprint Exhaust
Podcast: R53 MCS SS Exhaust
R53 JCW Cold Air Intake
Reader Rev.: R53 JCW Brakes
R50 Supersprint Exhaust
R50 Remus Exhaust
R50 Promini Intake
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Schroth Harness System
R50 CVT Steering Wheel Paddles

Exterior Accessories:
Miniature's Receiver Hitch
OEM White Tail Lights

Lifestyle Accessories:
MINI_Motion Watch
MINI_Motion Driving Shoe

Audio:
MINI Digital SoundModul
ICE-Link Plus iPod Adapter
Official BMW/iPod adapter
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Kenwood iPod Interface
Alpine iPod Interface
Harman Kardon Stereo

Interior Accessories:
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2004 MINI Armrest Reviewed
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R53: MCS Coupe
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R55: Clubman
R56: One/MC/MCS Coupe
R57: One/MC/MCS Convt.
R60: MINI SUV